The Beauty of Forgiveness

“I forgive you, I forgive me. Now when do I start to feel again?” –Kelly Clarkson, I Forgive You 

Heartbreak is the worst form of pain. You can experience heartbreak from a lover, a friend, a family member, even a stranger. I have seen actors show this kind of pain (the best I’ve seen is Nina Dobrev in The Vampire Diaries when her character finally accepts that her brother is dead); it was hard to watch without tearing up. It’s even harder when I watch my friends cry over lost love or families that are falling apart. I have the gift of being able to connect with people in their times of sorrow and helping them cope, but the one thing I cannot do for them is forgive.

It takes a strong person to forgive someone. To forgive their transgressions. To forgive the pain they inflicted. To forgive their fall from grace. To forgive over and over again. Matthew 18:21-22 says that we must forgive our Brothers and Sisters In Christ not seven times, but seventy times seven times. That’s 490 times. If someone hurts us, we must continue to forgive them. If Jesus could take up the world’s sins upon Himself and forgive them while hanging from a cross, the least we can do is forgive each other.

But we must also forgive ourselves. We must forgive ourselves for being naïve and trusting too easily. We must forgive ourselves believing lies. We must forgive ourselves for not forgiving ourselves earlier. We must forgive over and over again. After we forgive ourselves, we can truly find happiness and peace.

That’s the beauty of forgiveness, I guess, the fact that you can do it over and over again. As a termite destroys a house’s foundation, anger and hatred can destroy you. They crumble your heart, blacken your spirit, and dissolve your faith. Through forgiveness, your heart is wiped clean and you get a fresh start.

The prayer Jesus gave His disciples asks God to “…forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us…” When you decide to forgive either yourself or another person, remember that healing takes time. Forgiveness is hard, as is redemption and the rebuilding of trust, but the inner peace is well worth it.